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G.R.I.P.E.
By Pastor Wes | November 9, 2008
There are five internal motivations that cause a person to complain. You can remember them with the acronym:
G.R.I.P.E.
Get Attention
People have an innate desire to connect with others. It is human nature to want others to notice us. In an attempt to try and connect, people often open conversations with complaints.
Remove Responsibility
A person will often complain to you as a means of playing situational “hot potato.” Their complaining to you is a way of saying, “The problem was mine; it’s now yours, you deal with it!”
Inspire Envy
Complaining is a form of bragging. When a person complains they are implying that they do not possess whatever negative attribute they are complaining about. The complaint is a testament to their superiority; they are bragging.
Power
People use complaints as a way of lobbying for a majority position of control. They are trying to sway you to their side thereby giving their position more power and authority.
Excuse Poor Performance
A person may complain of a scratchy throat before singing in public. A child may complain of a stomach ache before a test. These complaints are often attempts to lower the expectations of the person they are complaining to and to pre-excuse possible poor performance.
Do you see in these internal motivations reasons why you complain? How about your friends, family or coworkers?
Watch for these things and when you are tempted to complain, draw a deep breath and count your blessings instead.
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December 12th, 2008 at 8:26 am
Great post - I’m going to have to print this one out and use it if that’s okay. I really like the “R” and I hadn’t thought about that before. I’ll have to watch my husband and boys more closely now with this in mind. We are working on their griping and this could really be the tool I’ve been looking for.
Thanks for the insight.
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